I'm busy. I do still care though. I hope everyone is great. And please don't forget about us.
Oh, by the way, WE ELOPED. Yep, married. Happy!
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I really wanna but...
It's been way too long. Way too many things have happened since the last time I blogged. Life is surely taking it's course. I have changed, my family has changed and the weather has changed. I'm overwhelmed contemplating where to begin in the blogging process again. I want to blog but then again... I'm just so damn busy that I barely have time to catch my breath, nevermind blogging...
I'm busy. I do still care though. I hope everyone is great. And please don't forget about us.
Oh, by the way, WE ELOPED. Yep, married. Happy!
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Have a few pics!
I'm busy. I do still care though. I hope everyone is great. And please don't forget about us.
Oh, by the way, WE ELOPED. Yep, married. Happy!
Martin Luther King Jr., I love you!
"Martin Luther King jr., I love you!" that was what Casper shouted as we were playing soccer in his front yard and I couldn't agree with him more. We always have a great time with the Neverazes. Music, beer, RC cars, food, laughs...I could go on and on!
Every so often Lindsey and I talk about our "ups" and "downs" of a certain time period, the day, the weekend, etc. and this weekend I had plenty of both.
Downs...
1. The relentless downpoor on Sunday afternoon sucked. Jerome and I were on a roll with the Ford early in the morning until when we were haulted by God's tears.
2. The Cowboys lost. (Honestly I didn't watch any of the game so it's not too much of a down.)
3. Lastly, My Dina family was shifty as always. ehhhh
Ups...
1. As soon as I arrived into town Friday night I was ambushed. Sergeant Lindsey headed up a nerf-gun assault. Those who accompanied her were Private Casper, Private Jack and Private Benny. And guess what they were aiming at....my Privates. It was fun but not for my nugget pouch.
2. Lindsey and I were blessed with a couple hours out without Sunny. Thank you Sasha and Jerome. I'm not going into detail about it though, those times are ours.
3. Finally, the last "up", was making the decision to get the hell out of Dina Sunday night. No offense to you Stupee-Da'nubee's (as Lindsey's uncle would say) but it is an awesome feeling to see Dina in the rearview mirror and Redondo Beach on the horizon. Monday was then spent relaxin to the last 4 episodes, season 2, of Entourage. Dope!
I took a couple pics of the Ford with my phone. Its the Holley 2 barrel carburetor and the soon-to-be beautiful 312 V8 Y-block that will drive the Mendoza family to the beach. (You can't see but my eyes are closed and I'm smiling.)
Every so often Lindsey and I talk about our "ups" and "downs" of a certain time period, the day, the weekend, etc. and this weekend I had plenty of both.
Downs...
1. The relentless downpoor on Sunday afternoon sucked. Jerome and I were on a roll with the Ford early in the morning until when we were haulted by God's tears.
2. The Cowboys lost. (Honestly I didn't watch any of the game so it's not too much of a down.)
3. Lastly, My Dina family was shifty as always. ehhhh
Ups...
1. As soon as I arrived into town Friday night I was ambushed. Sergeant Lindsey headed up a nerf-gun assault. Those who accompanied her were Private Casper, Private Jack and Private Benny. And guess what they were aiming at....my Privates. It was fun but not for my nugget pouch.
2. Lindsey and I were blessed with a couple hours out without Sunny. Thank you Sasha and Jerome. I'm not going into detail about it though, those times are ours.
3. Finally, the last "up", was making the decision to get the hell out of Dina Sunday night. No offense to you Stupee-Da'nubee's (as Lindsey's uncle would say) but it is an awesome feeling to see Dina in the rearview mirror and Redondo Beach on the horizon. Monday was then spent relaxin to the last 4 episodes, season 2, of Entourage. Dope!
I took a couple pics of the Ford with my phone. Its the Holley 2 barrel carburetor and the soon-to-be beautiful 312 V8 Y-block that will drive the Mendoza family to the beach. (You can't see but my eyes are closed and I'm smiling.)
Free Time
So the girl and the boy are in Dina this week giving me a bit of free time. The one thing I always wish I had more time for is drawing. I made it a point to get a couple pieces done or at least get them started. I finished a HAND that I started sometime last week that I am really proud of. Anatomy is a bitch to draw especially when your trying to do it while pretending to be busy at work. Kiddin. Sort-a. I've done hands before and they suck this one is decent.
B-Boi is growing up pretty fast and is looking cute...just like you-know-who!
Enjoy the following phone pics.
This HAND was done with pencil on printer paper. Inexpensive art is my forte.
This SUNSET is my first attempt at using pastels on sketch paper (18x24). The pastels are similar to charcoal, messy! I want to more so I can get better at it. It's fun. I'm working on another with flowers that I hope to finish before my boo gets back.
We drank some cheap Riesling wine and got totally shmaded last weekend. That is the type of inexpensive people we are. Tatoos with sharpies on the neck were inevitable.
He says CHEESE at the same time. Funny boy!
Handsome like his Pop!
Right here he is wearing a shirt I had when I was a baby. DOPE!
I only watch football when it's playoff time. This year the Cowboys are there, sweet.
B-Boi is growing up pretty fast and is looking cute...just like you-know-who!
Enjoy the following phone pics.
This HAND was done with pencil on printer paper. Inexpensive art is my forte. 
This SUNSET is my first attempt at using pastels on sketch paper (18x24). The pastels are similar to charcoal, messy! I want to more so I can get better at it. It's fun. I'm working on another with flowers that I hope to finish before my boo gets back. 
We drank some cheap Riesling wine and got totally shmaded last weekend. That is the type of inexpensive people we are. Tatoos with sharpies on the neck were inevitable. 
He says CHEESE at the same time. Funny boy!
Handsome like his Pop!
Right here he is wearing a shirt I had when I was a baby. DOPE!
I only watch football when it's playoff time. This year the Cowboys are there, sweet.
1957 Ford Fairlane 500
Dad here and that damn 57 Ford is on my mind. The saga of the Ford has haunted me for years. I've sat in the driver seat and have pretended to drive it since I was baby. My goal is to get that car on the road. One way or another I will be driving it and soon.
This weekend I will be in Dina to check out the status of the car. Hopefully I've prepared enough to not be too overwhelmed. I know it needs work and work is what I plan on giving it, along with a butt-load of money. The exciting thing is picturing the family cruising the streets of So-Cal.
Lets see how this plays out. I won't let this saga go by the wayside any longer.
This weekend I will be in Dina to check out the status of the car. Hopefully I've prepared enough to not be too overwhelmed. I know it needs work and work is what I plan on giving it, along with a butt-load of money. The exciting thing is picturing the family cruising the streets of So-Cal.
Lets see how this plays out. I won't let this saga go by the wayside any longer.
Who Makes The Rules Around Here Again?
Agj;asdgf;wekgf'wjebvfk/jwdghfo'ierhy. There.
It's nearing 1 in the morn and my brain is running at full sprint speed. My brain is actually so tired that the sprint is more like a drunk person sprint and I'm not thinking compeltely clearly (certainly not to insinuate that I always think clearly when well rested) but my point is that I am tired but I can't sleep. SO here I am.
Let me tell you about the last two days. They have been HELL. Yes, HELL in all caps. Not to be overdramatic here, my HELL is pretty mellow compared to some, but nonetheless, I have wondered what I may have gotten myself into recently.
Allow me to start with my darling little dumpling of a biscuit baby boy Benjamin. While he is everything that a little boy should be, precious, animated, a lot like his mother, and so much more, I think he has been siding with the little devil on his left shoulder. Everything, and I do mean evvveerryyything has been up to him.
Me: Don't jump on the sofa
B: Jumping on sofa, throwing cushions off of sofa
Me: Don't put your toothbrush in the toilet
B: Flush, yep, there was a toy car in there too
Me: Time for your long over due nap
B: Time for you to shut the hell up, I'm not taking a nap (yes, he miraculously learned how to say all that)
You get my point.
I'm not sure if the tooth fairy dropped off more teeth under his gums just to get my goose at the beginning of a new semester or if he is learning that he is the boss around here, but either way, he's pretty much been calling the shots for the last few. I know, why am I allowing this? Well, you sit here and listen to him scream his pretty little head off until he gets his way, and I'll put bets on your horse that you will think just like me....here kid, have it your way. Would you like a large coke with that as well? The most horrible part of all of this is that he is so darn cute when he gets mad and it's so darn funny when he throws himself on the floor (although I am under orders not to laugh or let him know that I am even watching him throw a tantrum). So Benny, our little Bumbling B, is a shot caller. And he knows it. I know we need to put our fat heads together and think like parents instead of babysitters so that we can "guide" him and more importantly teach him to knock this shit off, but I gotta admit, it's just easier to give him his way (I'm fully aware of the reprocussions of this statement). It's easier and I like to underestimate the manipulative powers of babies. They are afterall, just babies.
Anyhooha, on to bigger fish in the deep fryer. School. Yes. School. I have to say this: WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING 5 YEARS AGO? I give myself credit for making it out of my teenage and early twenties alive, so I don't beat myself up too badly for not completing school during my first go at it. But my second...WHY? There is no good gd reason that I couldn't have finished besides the taste of beer was far too tempting and I couldn't jump off that loooooong wagon ride that I loved. Ok, good reason, but still. Here I am all these years later giving the third go at it and trying to finish up that last semester of straggling classes that I could have taken long ago but they would have severly cut into my curing-the-hangover-from-last-night time, so nope, never accomplished them.
My law professor was giving a scenario today to our class full of nearly prepubescent kids and asked something to the effect of "what time do you college students wake up on a Sunday morning" and I thought to myself 'Oh dear karma, I am now the old person in class that I used to make fun of'' as I looked around and realized that I was like the second or third oldest person in the entire room and could not even answer that question for fear of total humiliation.. I think the professor was probably even younger than me, but she's a hot tiny little asian thing, and you know you never can tell the true age of an asian. Lucky bitches. Furthermore I was clearly ready to place all of my money on the idea that my guess of 85% of the class probably had no idea what it was like to have boobies that fill up with milk and especially not in the middle of a community college business law course.
Long ago I was annoyed by the "old" ladies who always sat in the front rows of class and asked all the questions which prevented us from being released 3 minutes early from class and my dying hunger (which was satisfied by a single bean burrito from Taco Bell) could not be immediately alleviated. It was alllllll the old ladies' faults. They pulled their back packs on wheels while I lugged my books around in a shoulder bag while walking lopsided. They clogged the sidewalks with those pull behind back packs er should I say suitcases. Now, I know the deal. One day of trying to carry my shoulder bag and walking lopsided to a single class, and those pull behinds aren't looking so bad. Besides, it was made clearly evident to me today (even after I put on my beaded bracelets, and spiked my hair out like an 18 year old punk rocker, and even wore a new white tank top) that I am not by any means "fashionable". I do suppose that since being a housewife and stay at home mom on a single budget, I have lost a little bit of the fashion that I never really had, so I might as well have a healthy back too and pull a mini suitcase. I'm not too proud to laugh at myself!
So yep. School has started and the C grades that were previously acceptable are out of the question now. I';ll leave those for those new little 18 year olds to figure out. I have this mental stress case of making sure that I am not forgetting anything, and the truth is, I can't even remember how I used to do all of this while consuming an army's worth of alcohol and working. It was so easy back then, why in the hell didn't I finish before I had a little butterball turkey to look after? He could care less about the 6 chapters that I need to read. I mean afterall, this is his world. I just live in it.
It's nearing 1 in the morn and my brain is running at full sprint speed. My brain is actually so tired that the sprint is more like a drunk person sprint and I'm not thinking compeltely clearly (certainly not to insinuate that I always think clearly when well rested) but my point is that I am tired but I can't sleep. SO here I am.
Let me tell you about the last two days. They have been HELL. Yes, HELL in all caps. Not to be overdramatic here, my HELL is pretty mellow compared to some, but nonetheless, I have wondered what I may have gotten myself into recently.
Allow me to start with my darling little dumpling of a biscuit baby boy Benjamin. While he is everything that a little boy should be, precious, animated, a lot like his mother, and so much more, I think he has been siding with the little devil on his left shoulder. Everything, and I do mean evvveerryyything has been up to him.
Me: Don't jump on the sofa
B: Jumping on sofa, throwing cushions off of sofa
Me: Don't put your toothbrush in the toilet
B: Flush, yep, there was a toy car in there too
Me: Time for your long over due nap
B: Time for you to shut the hell up, I'm not taking a nap (yes, he miraculously learned how to say all that)
You get my point.
I'm not sure if the tooth fairy dropped off more teeth under his gums just to get my goose at the beginning of a new semester or if he is learning that he is the boss around here, but either way, he's pretty much been calling the shots for the last few. I know, why am I allowing this? Well, you sit here and listen to him scream his pretty little head off until he gets his way, and I'll put bets on your horse that you will think just like me....here kid, have it your way. Would you like a large coke with that as well? The most horrible part of all of this is that he is so darn cute when he gets mad and it's so darn funny when he throws himself on the floor (although I am under orders not to laugh or let him know that I am even watching him throw a tantrum). So Benny, our little Bumbling B, is a shot caller. And he knows it. I know we need to put our fat heads together and think like parents instead of babysitters so that we can "guide" him and more importantly teach him to knock this shit off, but I gotta admit, it's just easier to give him his way (I'm fully aware of the reprocussions of this statement). It's easier and I like to underestimate the manipulative powers of babies. They are afterall, just babies.
Anyhooha, on to bigger fish in the deep fryer. School. Yes. School. I have to say this: WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING 5 YEARS AGO? I give myself credit for making it out of my teenage and early twenties alive, so I don't beat myself up too badly for not completing school during my first go at it. But my second...WHY? There is no good gd reason that I couldn't have finished besides the taste of beer was far too tempting and I couldn't jump off that loooooong wagon ride that I loved. Ok, good reason, but still. Here I am all these years later giving the third go at it and trying to finish up that last semester of straggling classes that I could have taken long ago but they would have severly cut into my curing-the-hangover-from-last-night time, so nope, never accomplished them.
My law professor was giving a scenario today to our class full of nearly prepubescent kids and asked something to the effect of "what time do you college students wake up on a Sunday morning" and I thought to myself 'Oh dear karma, I am now the old person in class that I used to make fun of'' as I looked around and realized that I was like the second or third oldest person in the entire room and could not even answer that question for fear of total humiliation.. I think the professor was probably even younger than me, but she's a hot tiny little asian thing, and you know you never can tell the true age of an asian. Lucky bitches. Furthermore I was clearly ready to place all of my money on the idea that my guess of 85% of the class probably had no idea what it was like to have boobies that fill up with milk and especially not in the middle of a community college business law course.
Long ago I was annoyed by the "old" ladies who always sat in the front rows of class and asked all the questions which prevented us from being released 3 minutes early from class and my dying hunger (which was satisfied by a single bean burrito from Taco Bell) could not be immediately alleviated. It was alllllll the old ladies' faults. They pulled their back packs on wheels while I lugged my books around in a shoulder bag while walking lopsided. They clogged the sidewalks with those pull behind back packs er should I say suitcases. Now, I know the deal. One day of trying to carry my shoulder bag and walking lopsided to a single class, and those pull behinds aren't looking so bad. Besides, it was made clearly evident to me today (even after I put on my beaded bracelets, and spiked my hair out like an 18 year old punk rocker, and even wore a new white tank top) that I am not by any means "fashionable". I do suppose that since being a housewife and stay at home mom on a single budget, I have lost a little bit of the fashion that I never really had, so I might as well have a healthy back too and pull a mini suitcase. I'm not too proud to laugh at myself!
So yep. School has started and the C grades that were previously acceptable are out of the question now. I';ll leave those for those new little 18 year olds to figure out. I have this mental stress case of making sure that I am not forgetting anything, and the truth is, I can't even remember how I used to do all of this while consuming an army's worth of alcohol and working. It was so easy back then, why in the hell didn't I finish before I had a little butterball turkey to look after? He could care less about the 6 chapters that I need to read. I mean afterall, this is his world. I just live in it.
Shhhhh Ze Bebes Are Seepin
I walked in from a quick trip to the bed and market and I found my little dumpling sound asleep next to Papa Bear. Did Papa Bear put whiskey in Baby Bear's poridge? I'm positively certain that he didn't miraculously grow a boob during my outing. How did he do this?
I'll let them sleep it off for awhile.....
.
Holy Fire Batman, I think we Might Be In Hell
My friend Denise occasionally told me that I was going to hell, but I always thought she would be there too driving the waterless fire truck. I know, that sounds crude, but it's all in good fun! Well, to my suprise, she is not here andn there are some major fires burning. Does this mean we aren't in hell?
We stayed up way too late last night and saw on the news that the closest fire to us is only like 10-15 miles away, if that. Of course, being as investigative (fancy word for nosey I do suppose) as we are, we loaded bare back Benny up in the back seat of the car at 11:30 and set out for a glipse of hell. Yeah, the term rubber necker doesn't do justice I suppose. Actually, I would have loved to catch a few pictures but half way to a good look out point Johnny reminded me that I didn't even bring the camera-I'm never without the damn thing unless I need it for a specific purpose. Now, I know better than to get int he way of emergency officials, so I wasn't dumb enough to actually drive to the fire albeit Johnny's suggestion. We got to the top of the hill near our house and could see all the helicopters flying and the glow of the firey gates of hell. Scary.
Allow me to rewind. Yesterday morning when I fiinnaallly woke up (checking to see if you have been reading), I smelled a campfire. Mmmmmm.. campfire! Wait a second.. campfire in RB? Then the smell just became annoying. The temperature outside said HELL and there was no wind. Boobs McGee (the weather girl) on KCal9 said there was an air quailty problem. Duh. A few smart ass thoughts ran through my head but I am trying to be a better person so I did not actually say them out loud although if I could get away with the torretts excuse, I'm not above using it. So the air quality was shitty. This equates to: Keep your babies and grandparents indoors. Your sick athsmatic little sisters too. My immediate reaction was 'yay.. another lazy day for mama'. I did however commit myself later in the day to a park morning for today. I thought maybe the air would be better and my poor darling of a babe could use some social time with other people and children besides his crazy mama. But ehhh.....KstupidCal9 reported Hell's closest opening in Palos Verdes and I gotta rush of campfire in my nostrils again. I though it would be a wise good mommy move to keep the babe inside again so late last night after our outing to spot hell, I backed out of the park deal. Okay, it is half and half reasons. I knew I wouldn't be ready to get out of bed early enough this morning and of course the air quality.
We stayed up way too late last night and saw on the news that the closest fire to us is only like 10-15 miles away, if that. Of course, being as investigative (fancy word for nosey I do suppose) as we are, we loaded bare back Benny up in the back seat of the car at 11:30 and set out for a glipse of hell. Yeah, the term rubber necker doesn't do justice I suppose. Actually, I would have loved to catch a few pictures but half way to a good look out point Johnny reminded me that I didn't even bring the camera-I'm never without the damn thing unless I need it for a specific purpose. Now, I know better than to get int he way of emergency officials, so I wasn't dumb enough to actually drive to the fire albeit Johnny's suggestion. We got to the top of the hill near our house and could see all the helicopters flying and the glow of the firey gates of hell. Scary.
Allow me to rewind. Yesterday morning when I fiinnaallly woke up (checking to see if you have been reading), I smelled a campfire. Mmmmmm.. campfire! Wait a second.. campfire in RB? Then the smell just became annoying. The temperature outside said HELL and there was no wind. Boobs McGee (the weather girl) on KCal9 said there was an air quailty problem. Duh. A few smart ass thoughts ran through my head but I am trying to be a better person so I did not actually say them out loud although if I could get away with the torretts excuse, I'm not above using it. So the air quality was shitty. This equates to: Keep your babies and grandparents indoors. Your sick athsmatic little sisters too. My immediate reaction was 'yay.. another lazy day for mama'. I did however commit myself later in the day to a park morning for today. I thought maybe the air would be better and my poor darling of a babe could use some social time with other people and children besides his crazy mama. But ehhh.....KstupidCal9 reported Hell's closest opening in Palos Verdes and I gotta rush of campfire in my nostrils again. I though it would be a wise good mommy move to keep the babe inside again so late last night after our outing to spot hell, I backed out of the park deal. Okay, it is half and half reasons. I knew I wouldn't be ready to get out of bed early enough this morning and of course the air quality.
When I rose this morning (no, not from hell), I looked outside and took a deep breath and...nothing. There was no campfire smell or evidence that hell is around the corner from me. All of the fires are still burning. I do have compassion. Actually I have a lot of compassion and I do sincerely hope that the damage is minimal...I am not entirely mean all the time. So, we really could have gone to the park. Now the excuse lays completely on me and my laziness. This is what I get for looking out. So currently while the other children are wrapping up their park time, my poor babe is hiding behind the rocking chair reading a book. He needs friends.
I Love It When We Cuddle
The last few days (uhem..week) life has been on the right hand side of the stress-o-meter. Between telling people to eff off and settling back down from all the vacationing and running around, my personal bitch meter has been running pretty high as well. This has left me drained. DRAINED I tell you. Drained to the point that I didn't unpack my weekend bag until yesterday, and we got back home from the shit valley on Sunday evening. If know anything about me, it is that I always unpack the very next day. I can't stand to have bags of packed stuff lying around our 100 square foot of living space (okay,it isn't that small but it sure feels like it sometimes.) Anyhoo, the point is that I have been drained and hav ewanted nothing more than to just sleep for an entire week straight. Unfortunately for me, my boobs are still needed every few hours for greedy little B, and no sleepy for me until he says so. What a babe, right?
Well I am not the only person in this 100 square foot living space that has been drained either. Johnny has been dragging his little hi-ney as well. He's struggled to get to work and makeit through the day since Tuesday. So as he never does, he called out of his night class last night. He needed it as bad as I did. We parked our butts on the sofa and called it a night. We cuddled. Ahhh... After a 10 day trip to Never Never Land and a weekend in hell (yes, new name) it dawned on me that we really had not cuddled in like 53days. How has this guy stayed with me for 53 days and been cuddle-less? Ok, I'm kidding, it hasn't been 53 days but it feels like it.
B was quite a confused little feller. Why in the world is dad home? Why in the hell are mom and dad cuddling? I know, a lot to take for a kid who is creeping up on his first birthday. Then this morning Johnny continued sleeping past the alarm. Whoa...is the weekend here already? B woke us up as he usually does with a big good morning slap to the face. I suppose I deserve it after selflessly nursing the guy on demand all night long and holding him closely so he is soothed. Yes, I do not let anybody in this house forget that I do ALL the night parenting....well, for reasons which are obvious, but STILL....
So back to this cuddling biz. Not only was I so super lucky to get some cuddle action last night, Johnny took B out of bed this morning and let me sleep in after his rude slap awakening. What a pal! I woke a bit later to find breakfast. Of course he was feeling like crappies, but his dedication did not waver (or was he just super hungry and had leftovers from his own cooked breakfast? I'll never know). Yep, I have one hell of a guy.
Now time is counting down, and he will shortly have to go back to work to teach his night class which I support if he says I have to. I'd rather he take a few more hours to rest so he can be fully charged for the weekend (yep, I'm a selfish bitch and would rather that he was home than working). I guess I should just be happy that we cuddled.
Well I am not the only person in this 100 square foot living space that has been drained either. Johnny has been dragging his little hi-ney as well. He's struggled to get to work and makeit through the day since Tuesday. So as he never does, he called out of his night class last night. He needed it as bad as I did. We parked our butts on the sofa and called it a night. We cuddled. Ahhh... After a 10 day trip to Never Never Land and a weekend in hell (yes, new name) it dawned on me that we really had not cuddled in like 53days. How has this guy stayed with me for 53 days and been cuddle-less? Ok, I'm kidding, it hasn't been 53 days but it feels like it.
B was quite a confused little feller. Why in the world is dad home? Why in the hell are mom and dad cuddling? I know, a lot to take for a kid who is creeping up on his first birthday. Then this morning Johnny continued sleeping past the alarm. Whoa...is the weekend here already? B woke us up as he usually does with a big good morning slap to the face. I suppose I deserve it after selflessly nursing the guy on demand all night long and holding him closely so he is soothed. Yes, I do not let anybody in this house forget that I do ALL the night parenting....well, for reasons which are obvious, but STILL....
So back to this cuddling biz. Not only was I so super lucky to get some cuddle action last night, Johnny took B out of bed this morning and let me sleep in after his rude slap awakening. What a pal! I woke a bit later to find breakfast. Of course he was feeling like crappies, but his dedication did not waver (or was he just super hungry and had leftovers from his own cooked breakfast? I'll never know). Yep, I have one hell of a guy.
Now time is counting down, and he will shortly have to go back to work to teach his night class which I support if he says I have to. I'd rather he take a few more hours to rest so he can be fully charged for the weekend (yep, I'm a selfish bitch and would rather that he was home than working). I guess I should just be happy that we cuddled.
Allow Me To Catch You Up
Now that I am back, I may be a sore in your side, but I promnise I won't send you a jabazillion emails telling you everyday that I have posted something. I will allow you to come and go at your own free will although I'd much rather keep you all captive prisoners!
So in the last month we have done a lot! B and I took a much needed trip to Colorado (hence the below Colorado pics), we camped at Oceano, are starting a new semester of school (yah, I know...shoosh), and B found his "dingy"! We have decided to call it a dingy because that is what the kids that B hangs with call it, and I'd hate for him to be any different. You know kids have crazy conversations like that..."Owww.. he kicked me in the nards.." B-"What in the world are NARDS????" Not that it matters that much in the big scheme of life adventures, but we would like to be uniform and call it what the others call it! So there. Anyway, he found it and hasn't forgotten it, which as far as I understand about men, he never will forget it. His nearly year of innocence came to an end!
Colorado was amazing and I found a little bit of my heart calling it home. Yeah, we are tossing around the idea of moving but we have a lot of tossing still yet to do sonce school seems like a never ending uphill in the snow with only one shoe for 7.3 miles kinda deal. My little Ronan nephew pulled my heartstrings and Benny pulled the cats tails. My sister and I got reconnected and she cooked my fat ass some good eats. It was delightful.
Also in the month of July I decided in my most impulsive fashion that I would cut off my hair. To everyone's suprise, I haven't complained about it once. I actually love the second guessing "is she a lesbian? Wait, she has a baby" "Lesbians can have babys" "But she's with a man"...kinda converstaions that I know people are having behind my back. The truth of the whole hair cutting matter is that I don't want to deal with crap that consumes way too much of my time and prevents me from jumping in pools of water freely for fear of the hair do. I couldn't be happier with my lesbian look a like coif.
So in the last month we have done a lot! B and I took a much needed trip to Colorado (hence the below Colorado pics), we camped at Oceano, are starting a new semester of school (yah, I know...shoosh), and B found his "dingy"! We have decided to call it a dingy because that is what the kids that B hangs with call it, and I'd hate for him to be any different. You know kids have crazy conversations like that..."Owww.. he kicked me in the nards.." B-"What in the world are NARDS????" Not that it matters that much in the big scheme of life adventures, but we would like to be uniform and call it what the others call it! So there. Anyway, he found it and hasn't forgotten it, which as far as I understand about men, he never will forget it. His nearly year of innocence came to an end!
Colorado was amazing and I found a little bit of my heart calling it home. Yeah, we are tossing around the idea of moving but we have a lot of tossing still yet to do sonce school seems like a never ending uphill in the snow with only one shoe for 7.3 miles kinda deal. My little Ronan nephew pulled my heartstrings and Benny pulled the cats tails. My sister and I got reconnected and she cooked my fat ass some good eats. It was delightful.
Also in the month of July I decided in my most impulsive fashion that I would cut off my hair. To everyone's suprise, I haven't complained about it once. I actually love the second guessing "is she a lesbian? Wait, she has a baby" "Lesbians can have babys" "But she's with a man"...kinda converstaions that I know people are having behind my back. The truth of the whole hair cutting matter is that I don't want to deal with crap that consumes way too much of my time and prevents me from jumping in pools of water freely for fear of the hair do. I couldn't be happier with my lesbian look a like coif.
Ilove it although the two of us may easily be confused at a cas-jeans and pilsner kinda dinner!
Ok, I'm Here
I've recently been reinspired to continue writing and quit being a total D-bag and putting off something that I absolutely love. I have to be honest in the reason that I set this blog aside for so long. I had nothing to say which could be laid down uncensored. I've had this little inner struggle with censorship and those who sometimes read my blog. I've kept it pretty PG thus far, but as my sister pointed out, the way that I have previously written this blog is not really how I speak. So, now that I have officially F listed myself from those who I previously chose to censor my blog for, I am going to begin anew and throw in a few cuss words for the like, because that is how I roll...I like the shock and awe of saying things like douche-tard. Besides, how many cute little pictures of my most adored best friend can I post before I am just being an over the top showy mother. Yep, I DO have the cutest little button of a boy, and if you say any different I will delete you from my facebook or myspace because those are both IMPORTANT to me! But really, I like to think of my writing as far more entertaining than the bazillion pictures of Benny! Yeah, I said it!
So now that I have chose to come back around and show some real love, I have to forewarn you. This shit is real and for those judgy types, well, I'm sure that you will have something to say, but all in all, us three here in Los Angeles county are doing well and THAT is what matters! Carry on!
So now that I have chose to come back around and show some real love, I have to forewarn you. This shit is real and for those judgy types, well, I'm sure that you will have something to say, but all in all, us three here in Los Angeles county are doing well and THAT is what matters! Carry on!
My Trail Of Thoughts on A Tuesday Night
I have my windows and front door open. Benny is down for a late evening nap-a-roo. He isn't feeling well so I am letting him sleep as he wishes. I'm breathing in the ocean breeze and I find myself back to square one! Evening is my most beloved time of the day, although most of the day down in southern california is beautiful. Evenings however always hold a special place in my heart! Evenings always remind me of being a child and my parents coming home from work, the day cooling down, watching the sun move into what I can't see and then as a teen, time to hang out with friends. Each evening seems to bring a certain level of nostalgia. I always have random memories floating through my mind during evening hours, and I always think of where I want my mext memories to begin, or where I want to go back to.
I can't imagine living in one place so long that I don't experience any other evening air. My traveling soul desires to be in 13 other places right now and I can't wait to breathe the Colorado evening next! I wonder what the lake in Tennessee feels like right now and I wonder if I sat on the patio in FLorida if I would love it as much now as I did then. I wonder if the breeze in Arizona is cool or if the ocean waves in Texas are as refreshing as I imagine them.
Some commend my desire to travel and pack it all up and continually step into the unknown. I love the feeling of exploring what I didn't even know existed. I love meeting people that I never knew had a face. I love becoming more tolerant as I become smarter in the world around me. I love finding more about what I love.
Our little family is in the middle of taking a closer look at Pharmacy schools and the options are endless. I feel so liberated that we can go anywhere and do so willingly. I am so excited that again we will have the opportunity to continue exploring...and I'm so glad to have my partner to travel with!
I look back on the last year of my life. Whew, when we first arrived in California it seemed as though nothing was going right for us. Savings was running out, school wasn't so much of an option, 5 employment rejection letters a week seemed to be rolling in and all the while I was becoming very pregnant. Had one of the things that went wrong actaully gone right, we wouldn't be exactly where we are today... and now I can appreciate all of the hardship. I love this ocean air so much that all those wrong things made one hell of a right! I wonder what the ocean air in Costa Rica smells like?
I can't imagine living in one place so long that I don't experience any other evening air. My traveling soul desires to be in 13 other places right now and I can't wait to breathe the Colorado evening next! I wonder what the lake in Tennessee feels like right now and I wonder if I sat on the patio in FLorida if I would love it as much now as I did then. I wonder if the breeze in Arizona is cool or if the ocean waves in Texas are as refreshing as I imagine them.
Some commend my desire to travel and pack it all up and continually step into the unknown. I love the feeling of exploring what I didn't even know existed. I love meeting people that I never knew had a face. I love becoming more tolerant as I become smarter in the world around me. I love finding more about what I love.
Our little family is in the middle of taking a closer look at Pharmacy schools and the options are endless. I feel so liberated that we can go anywhere and do so willingly. I am so excited that again we will have the opportunity to continue exploring...and I'm so glad to have my partner to travel with!
I look back on the last year of my life. Whew, when we first arrived in California it seemed as though nothing was going right for us. Savings was running out, school wasn't so much of an option, 5 employment rejection letters a week seemed to be rolling in and all the while I was becoming very pregnant. Had one of the things that went wrong actaully gone right, we wouldn't be exactly where we are today... and now I can appreciate all of the hardship. I love this ocean air so much that all those wrong things made one hell of a right! I wonder what the ocean air in Costa Rica smells like?
Cousins!
We spent time with family last week. Here are some pictures of Benny and his cousin and my cousins! Cousins.. I miss you already! Sara, Jenny and I had a blast. I want them to move down here so bad!
Maddy and Benny in the buble bath.. Maddy says "Look at Benny, he's so cute". Seriously, it is the cutest thing ever!
1 year and 1 week apart! She acts like such a big girl when she plays with him.
Benny's new wagon.. thanks uncle!
He doesn't understand how to slide yet... park day with grandma!
Maddy bangedon each drum with the drum stick then tapped Benny on the head. It was so funny but Benny didn't care for it!
They are just so stinking cute together!
Venice Beach. They were in awe of the freaks!
Hermosa Beach. They had to put their feet in the ocean before leaving. Of course, the sun came out as we were leaving!
Give Peas A Chance
We are slooooooowly (too slowly for some) introducing food to Benny. I mixed some peas with cereal to see how he would fair, and to my suprise, he didn't turn his face away. He winced slightly, but got over it quickly. After a few bites we let him play. Enjoy the pics!
He is so fascinated by the corners of his table top. Its funny to watch him rub!
He loves rubbing his hand back and forth to feel the smoothness of his high chair. Let the food painting begin!
He is so fascinated by the corners of his table top. Its funny to watch him rub!
Clean up is not so fun though!
Waaaaaaaa.... we took his pea project away and he was MAD!
Mmm Bubblegum Tooth Paste. Er, Yuck Paste!
Now that Benny has two front teeth, we decided to give tooth brushing a try. More for fun than for actual teeth cleaning. The pictures almost speak for themselves!
Hhmm.. this tastes like a chop shop attempt at a bubblegum flavor! Either way it is temporarily exciting him!
We're both happy. I'm excited to give this a "funsies" try, and he's happy but just isn't showing it. Obviously he has no clue what is really going on!
I'm probably saying something like "oooookkkaaay, here we go" in my "baby voice". It's my way of explaining things to him!
Hhmm.. this tastes like a chop shop attempt at a bubblegum flavor! Either way it is temporarily exciting him!
Gotta get those two front teeth. Ehh.. Benny is starting to dislike teeth brushing. He's had enough.
I give up. He's fought me all that I was willing to take and so I relented and put the cap on the toothbrush thus ending our toothbrushing affair!
Gripes and Groans
I'm going to take this space as a forum to gripe tonight. But first I must say that Benny is peacfully sleeping at 8 PM tonight! This is rare, but we are going to try something new... I will go into more details in a minute. Beware, this is an extremely long winded blog (yet amusing if I do say myself)!
So, Benny and I went on a normal evening walk tonight. We skipped the beach and headed for the donut shop for a cup of coffee for me of course (it's not appropriate for him at 6 PM) and then to the post office. Anyway, according to the signs along the way, the sidewalk on the side of the road that the donut shop sits was closed for construction so I walked on the opposite side. No big deal although I did have to jay walk..oopsie. I got coffee and Benny got his greeting from his favorite donut shop lady (we are never quite sure what she is saying, but she is always smiling when she speaks so it must be nice!).
We proceeded to the Post Office which is on the same side of the street as the donut shop. Following? If not, go back and re-read... I'll wait for you! Ok, on our way back I decided to cross the street near the post office in order to avoid jay walking again. There were no advance warnings of a sidewalk closure either, so I thought perfect, and we were safe! Oh no. I came up to a sign that said the sidewalk was closed directly on top of the closed portion- right there, closed!! I looked around and my options were to cut through a parking lot and into an alley which I wasn't about to do. I've watched enough crime shows to know that's a no-no. I could have turned around and walked two more blocks backwards which was most logical given my "abide by sidewalk closure sign" options but most inconvenient. My other option was to step into oncoming traffic on Artesia Blvd (the major road on this side of town)and I wasn't going to do that either. Quick thinking led me to move the cones that prevented my passing and walk lightly on the fresh concrete. I even looked behind me to make sure that I had not left traffic marks.
At this time I heard "That's fresh". Duh. I can see this. I shouted back "Well I'm not going to push my baby into oncoming traffic" then more yelling my way..."Thanks for stepping into our concrete", "Can't you see the sidewalk is closed" "There's a sign right there.. can't you read it?" "Are you too lazy to go around?" and more yelling which at this point I wasn't even listening to. I was firing back that if there had been a sign posted BEFORE I got to the closure I would have found a different route and that it's ludacris to expect me to "go around and into traffic". I was so mad that I asked if these guys were city employees. The guy that was doing all the yelling said in I'm sure his most cocky tone "yeah, we work for the city" so I asked his name. He gave me his first, but said it was none of my business when I asked for his last. Hmph. Obviously he didn't expect me to be the person that I am!
I was shaking on the inside. This creep was so threatening. I pushed the stroller out of there as fast as possible as he was beginning to yell again. There were two onlookers who were in disbelief as well. The whole way home I was fuming inside. These are the people that take safety out of our towns and make women afraid to enjoy evening air.
I decided to write to the city manager. My message was short and to the point: this was unacceptable behavior by any city worker who essentially represents the city. Secondly, there should be signs posted that the sidewalk is closed at the beginning of the block. We will see if I get a response. If not, you all know me...I won't give this up. I guess then I'll have to contact my city council member, and then there is the mayor's office. I believe firmly in the chain of command so I will follow it with the newspaper being the highest in command! I'm sure I will get a speedy response! Grrr... talk about killing my night!
Onto other issues! So Benny is asleep early tonight because we are going to try a new schedule! The reason for this is that he is not doing well at the gym Kid's Klub. I know the real reason is more like the person caring for him, but I thought I'd exhaust all other possible excuses for his crankiness before giving her the sole blame.
Last week I was called out of my 8:30 AM spinning class because he would not stop crying. I was reluctant to take him back, but I almost can't bear missing class. I waited the rest of the week out thinking that it could have been attributed to his teething. We went back yesterday. I finished my hour session and when I walked into the Kid's Klub he was crying again. The caregiver proceeded to tell me that Benny is "the worse baby that she has had because she can't get him to stop crying". I didn't take too much offense since I can tell that her vocabulary is limited therefore she probably doesn't know how to express herself wihtout calling him "the worse" (which is improper anyway!). But I was a little annoyed.
In the past this particular caregiver has repetitively asked me to bring him a bottle or a pacifier even after my kind explanations that he takes neither and the reason for his fingers and every other object he can get his little paws on and in his mouth is due to ta-da! TEETHING!!!!! It has occured to me that women who do not parent as I do have a hard time with the notion of not shoving something in the babe's mouth to shut him up! I finally asked if she actually gets on the floor and plays with him!?! What a concept! I have observed her many times with children in her care running around and she is at the counter computer with her back slightly to them. My personal opinion is that there should not be any reason for her to be at the counter unless she is checking someone in..which during the said obeservations the counter was empty. I'm just not sure if I understand how it is that someone who is considered a "caregiver" is unable to get a fresh 9 month old baby to stop crying! He is fed, diapered, rested and in good spirits when I drop him off!
Ok, so I got that off my chest. Back to why Benny is sleeping. So today I took benny "one more time" to the gym. This time was after his morning nap. I chose a light and quick workout. The reason that I went to the gym was more for the idea to see if a time change could do Benny a better favor and he would be in better spirits. To my delight, the caregiver was not working with the kids today!!! The girl that was working was on the floor with a few kids when I walked in. Yay! A real caregiver! When I returned 40 minutes later she told me that Benny was wonderful and had just started to cry a few minutes earlier.
So my question is: did B do well because of the new caregiver actually paying attention to him or was it the change in time frame that left him in a better mood? I'm figuring a combo of both, but I am going to try it again tomorrow. We decided that if Johnny and I start morning runs that perhaps we could change Benny's schedule a bit so he will nap earlier and I don't have to give up my mornings at the gym! I hope this works! We wore him out at the beach this afternoon and I prevented his late afternoon nap in order to get him to sleep early! Whew, this schedule stuff is hectic! I hope you all followed! I know I can get long winded at times..well, pretty much all the time!
And my last gripe is city parking!!! Arggggg..... I have found an entrance to the beach that I love love love but the city of Hermosa Beach makes it virtually impossible for any regular beach lover to afford to enjoy the beach! Most parking areas have a 1 hour limit unless you have a resident's pass. If you find a spot that is more than 1 hour, it is metered with most being a 3 hour time limit, at get this: $1.25 an hour!!!! These are in effect all day and everyday!!
There are two free lots which are 1/2 mile away (I've verified this) from the main beach entrance which is where the pier is, but unless you are willing to walk the distance and get there early enough to find a spot, the lots are pointless. We have been known to jog down to the beach from our house, but jogging and packing all the necessities one with a small child needs for an afternoon afair at the beach is not a very reasonable idea.
I read that the city's number one source of revenue is parking. This includes parking meters, resident passes and tickets. Let me tell you, they hand out tickets on a minute's expiration too. The "meter maid" could be mistaken for Polzi by some Internationals based on their speed and dedication for capturing any parking violator. Tickets are also given on street sweeping days if one is in the way of the great street sweeper. This has baffled me since moving down to Southern California. For a state in such financial crisis, city budgets being slashed along with city furloughs and hiring freezes, is the cost of street sweeping valid? Well, once one sees first hand the little meter maid driving directly in front of the street sweeper and handing out tickets to any vehicle in it's path ($40 bucks a pop if paid on time), it is apparent that the two work together and are a revenue generating force to be reckoned with.
I say all of us locals pay enough in taxes that we should be able to enjoy the beach at a lesser expense than our entire paycheck.. but I am highly doubtful that my complaint (or the other 65000 residents who feel the same) will be considered. I mean really, how else will the free plastic doggy doo-doo bags on the strand or the city's worker (who yells at a mother pushing a baby) salary be funded?
So, Benny and I went on a normal evening walk tonight. We skipped the beach and headed for the donut shop for a cup of coffee for me of course (it's not appropriate for him at 6 PM) and then to the post office. Anyway, according to the signs along the way, the sidewalk on the side of the road that the donut shop sits was closed for construction so I walked on the opposite side. No big deal although I did have to jay walk..oopsie. I got coffee and Benny got his greeting from his favorite donut shop lady (we are never quite sure what she is saying, but she is always smiling when she speaks so it must be nice!).
We proceeded to the Post Office which is on the same side of the street as the donut shop. Following? If not, go back and re-read... I'll wait for you! Ok, on our way back I decided to cross the street near the post office in order to avoid jay walking again. There were no advance warnings of a sidewalk closure either, so I thought perfect, and we were safe! Oh no. I came up to a sign that said the sidewalk was closed directly on top of the closed portion- right there, closed!! I looked around and my options were to cut through a parking lot and into an alley which I wasn't about to do. I've watched enough crime shows to know that's a no-no. I could have turned around and walked two more blocks backwards which was most logical given my "abide by sidewalk closure sign" options but most inconvenient. My other option was to step into oncoming traffic on Artesia Blvd (the major road on this side of town)and I wasn't going to do that either. Quick thinking led me to move the cones that prevented my passing and walk lightly on the fresh concrete. I even looked behind me to make sure that I had not left traffic marks.
At this time I heard "That's fresh". Duh. I can see this. I shouted back "Well I'm not going to push my baby into oncoming traffic" then more yelling my way..."Thanks for stepping into our concrete", "Can't you see the sidewalk is closed" "There's a sign right there.. can't you read it?" "Are you too lazy to go around?" and more yelling which at this point I wasn't even listening to. I was firing back that if there had been a sign posted BEFORE I got to the closure I would have found a different route and that it's ludacris to expect me to "go around and into traffic". I was so mad that I asked if these guys were city employees. The guy that was doing all the yelling said in I'm sure his most cocky tone "yeah, we work for the city" so I asked his name. He gave me his first, but said it was none of my business when I asked for his last. Hmph. Obviously he didn't expect me to be the person that I am!
I was shaking on the inside. This creep was so threatening. I pushed the stroller out of there as fast as possible as he was beginning to yell again. There were two onlookers who were in disbelief as well. The whole way home I was fuming inside. These are the people that take safety out of our towns and make women afraid to enjoy evening air.
I decided to write to the city manager. My message was short and to the point: this was unacceptable behavior by any city worker who essentially represents the city. Secondly, there should be signs posted that the sidewalk is closed at the beginning of the block. We will see if I get a response. If not, you all know me...I won't give this up. I guess then I'll have to contact my city council member, and then there is the mayor's office. I believe firmly in the chain of command so I will follow it with the newspaper being the highest in command! I'm sure I will get a speedy response! Grrr... talk about killing my night!
Onto other issues! So Benny is asleep early tonight because we are going to try a new schedule! The reason for this is that he is not doing well at the gym Kid's Klub. I know the real reason is more like the person caring for him, but I thought I'd exhaust all other possible excuses for his crankiness before giving her the sole blame.
Last week I was called out of my 8:30 AM spinning class because he would not stop crying. I was reluctant to take him back, but I almost can't bear missing class. I waited the rest of the week out thinking that it could have been attributed to his teething. We went back yesterday. I finished my hour session and when I walked into the Kid's Klub he was crying again. The caregiver proceeded to tell me that Benny is "the worse baby that she has had because she can't get him to stop crying". I didn't take too much offense since I can tell that her vocabulary is limited therefore she probably doesn't know how to express herself wihtout calling him "the worse" (which is improper anyway!). But I was a little annoyed.
In the past this particular caregiver has repetitively asked me to bring him a bottle or a pacifier even after my kind explanations that he takes neither and the reason for his fingers and every other object he can get his little paws on and in his mouth is due to ta-da! TEETHING!!!!! It has occured to me that women who do not parent as I do have a hard time with the notion of not shoving something in the babe's mouth to shut him up! I finally asked if she actually gets on the floor and plays with him!?! What a concept! I have observed her many times with children in her care running around and she is at the counter computer with her back slightly to them. My personal opinion is that there should not be any reason for her to be at the counter unless she is checking someone in..which during the said obeservations the counter was empty. I'm just not sure if I understand how it is that someone who is considered a "caregiver" is unable to get a fresh 9 month old baby to stop crying! He is fed, diapered, rested and in good spirits when I drop him off!
Ok, so I got that off my chest. Back to why Benny is sleeping. So today I took benny "one more time" to the gym. This time was after his morning nap. I chose a light and quick workout. The reason that I went to the gym was more for the idea to see if a time change could do Benny a better favor and he would be in better spirits. To my delight, the caregiver was not working with the kids today!!! The girl that was working was on the floor with a few kids when I walked in. Yay! A real caregiver! When I returned 40 minutes later she told me that Benny was wonderful and had just started to cry a few minutes earlier.
So my question is: did B do well because of the new caregiver actually paying attention to him or was it the change in time frame that left him in a better mood? I'm figuring a combo of both, but I am going to try it again tomorrow. We decided that if Johnny and I start morning runs that perhaps we could change Benny's schedule a bit so he will nap earlier and I don't have to give up my mornings at the gym! I hope this works! We wore him out at the beach this afternoon and I prevented his late afternoon nap in order to get him to sleep early! Whew, this schedule stuff is hectic! I hope you all followed! I know I can get long winded at times..well, pretty much all the time!
And my last gripe is city parking!!! Arggggg..... I have found an entrance to the beach that I love love love but the city of Hermosa Beach makes it virtually impossible for any regular beach lover to afford to enjoy the beach! Most parking areas have a 1 hour limit unless you have a resident's pass. If you find a spot that is more than 1 hour, it is metered with most being a 3 hour time limit, at get this: $1.25 an hour!!!! These are in effect all day and everyday!!
There are two free lots which are 1/2 mile away (I've verified this) from the main beach entrance which is where the pier is, but unless you are willing to walk the distance and get there early enough to find a spot, the lots are pointless. We have been known to jog down to the beach from our house, but jogging and packing all the necessities one with a small child needs for an afternoon afair at the beach is not a very reasonable idea.
I read that the city's number one source of revenue is parking. This includes parking meters, resident passes and tickets. Let me tell you, they hand out tickets on a minute's expiration too. The "meter maid" could be mistaken for Polzi by some Internationals based on their speed and dedication for capturing any parking violator. Tickets are also given on street sweeping days if one is in the way of the great street sweeper. This has baffled me since moving down to Southern California. For a state in such financial crisis, city budgets being slashed along with city furloughs and hiring freezes, is the cost of street sweeping valid? Well, once one sees first hand the little meter maid driving directly in front of the street sweeper and handing out tickets to any vehicle in it's path ($40 bucks a pop if paid on time), it is apparent that the two work together and are a revenue generating force to be reckoned with.
I say all of us locals pay enough in taxes that we should be able to enjoy the beach at a lesser expense than our entire paycheck.. but I am highly doubtful that my complaint (or the other 65000 residents who feel the same) will be considered. I mean really, how else will the free plastic doggy doo-doo bags on the strand or the city's worker (who yells at a mother pushing a baby) salary be funded?
Confessions Of An Average Mom
I often find myself spending way too much time thinking of all the things that I don't do as a mom. I feel like I am just average.... I love my son and want the best, but I see so many more moms doing so much more than I do. I confess that I am jealous of their seemingly never ending zest for motherhood. I begin to feel guilty for needing "ME" time and for asking for my own time out.
Against American Association of Pediatrics' advice, I allow Benny to watch Noggin TV although he isn't two years old yet. It gives me a chance to do non baby related things.. like the dishes and read the news! Sometimes I let Benny cry for 5 minutes before running to his rescue (albeit major mommy need). We don't read as many books as "they" say we should, eat the foods "they" advise, and I've let Benny taste chocolate and eat a french fry! I cuddle him all night long and don't force him to sleep anywhere but at my side. I nurse him on demand and let Benny be in control and I don't have any set schedule or timed naps for him. We get up and go at a moments notice and I nurse him wherever we are. Am I creating a problem for the future?
I feel inadequate at times because I am not completely on top of life's creativity tower. I listen to moms' ideas for so many things and I take it all in and think.. where do they think of this stuff? I know somewhere in my mind that ideas are passed from mom to mom and nobody knows it all, but I can't help but be an average mom wondering if my averageness is less than the acceptable average. In other words.. am I doing this stuff right or am I in the danger gray area?
I have prayed many mornings that Benny would fall back to sleep for "just a few more minutes".. and I fantasized what it would be like to have an entire day of selfish mommy-ness! Sometimes I look around our place and think "will this mess ever be cleaned up"? and of course it will be, just not today..and sometimes I wish it was today! We don't engage in daily curricular mom and me activites unless one considers trying to stay one step ahead of Benny with enterainment is considered mom and me activity. Am I hindering his growth?
I let Benny go to bed when he wants, wake up at 10 PM when Dad gets home if he wants and we listen to rock and roll music which may not be as kid friendly to some. Some days Benny only gets his hands and face washed and doesn't take a bath because I am just too stinking tired (those are days the house gets cleaned!). Some days he gets to shower with dad and then bathe with mom. Some times I almost feel like we aim at inconsistency in our parenthood. Is this what parenthood is? I know good parenting is doing what works for your family, but am I missing out on things that would actually work "better" for us because of my inability to operate at 100% for 100% of the time? Where do women find the energy to operate this way? I seriously want to know.. or is it not what it appears? If it isn't, it sure does look good!
At the end of the day though, I remember that I may be an average parent, but I don't just love my little guy in an average way. I would die protecting him and when his little eyes close at the end of the say I know that he is well loved and protected....even if I am just average!
Against American Association of Pediatrics' advice, I allow Benny to watch Noggin TV although he isn't two years old yet. It gives me a chance to do non baby related things.. like the dishes and read the news! Sometimes I let Benny cry for 5 minutes before running to his rescue (albeit major mommy need). We don't read as many books as "they" say we should, eat the foods "they" advise, and I've let Benny taste chocolate and eat a french fry! I cuddle him all night long and don't force him to sleep anywhere but at my side. I nurse him on demand and let Benny be in control and I don't have any set schedule or timed naps for him. We get up and go at a moments notice and I nurse him wherever we are. Am I creating a problem for the future?
I feel inadequate at times because I am not completely on top of life's creativity tower. I listen to moms' ideas for so many things and I take it all in and think.. where do they think of this stuff? I know somewhere in my mind that ideas are passed from mom to mom and nobody knows it all, but I can't help but be an average mom wondering if my averageness is less than the acceptable average. In other words.. am I doing this stuff right or am I in the danger gray area?
I have prayed many mornings that Benny would fall back to sleep for "just a few more minutes".. and I fantasized what it would be like to have an entire day of selfish mommy-ness! Sometimes I look around our place and think "will this mess ever be cleaned up"? and of course it will be, just not today..and sometimes I wish it was today! We don't engage in daily curricular mom and me activites unless one considers trying to stay one step ahead of Benny with enterainment is considered mom and me activity. Am I hindering his growth?
I let Benny go to bed when he wants, wake up at 10 PM when Dad gets home if he wants and we listen to rock and roll music which may not be as kid friendly to some. Some days Benny only gets his hands and face washed and doesn't take a bath because I am just too stinking tired (those are days the house gets cleaned!). Some days he gets to shower with dad and then bathe with mom. Some times I almost feel like we aim at inconsistency in our parenthood. Is this what parenthood is? I know good parenting is doing what works for your family, but am I missing out on things that would actually work "better" for us because of my inability to operate at 100% for 100% of the time? Where do women find the energy to operate this way? I seriously want to know.. or is it not what it appears? If it isn't, it sure does look good!
At the end of the day though, I remember that I may be an average parent, but I don't just love my little guy in an average way. I would die protecting him and when his little eyes close at the end of the say I know that he is well loved and protected....even if I am just average!
Oh Baby Teeth...How I Despise Thee
Benny is a mess. He slept for nothing last night and at 5:00 this morning Johnny was getting up and reaching for the teething tablets while I tried to comfort our restless baby boy. He cried and laughed and jumped around, put his head at the foot of the bed then turned around, got up and played with the blinds- all in random order. It went on and on. He couldn't decide what he wanted to do. Luckily within a few minutes he crashed again but it has left both of us very tired today and it's safe to assume that I am going to have to skip the gym because I don't want to leave Benny without me at all. I was called out of spinning yesterday because Benny screamed for 15 minutes until I picked him up. The minute that he made contact with me he stopped. Just like turning off a facet. Needless to say, he is not handling me being out of his sight for even a second and this sure is making things hard if I attempt anything.. so I have an excuse to be lazy (I'm hard on myself so I"ll take this when I have to!)
Tomorrow is our monthly La Leche League meeting... maybe some of the girls will have helpful tips or homeopathic advice. These bottom teeth are swollen buds which are refusing to break. I really wish that they would.. I'm not sure how many nights I can endure before pulling my own hair out sounds like a reasonable answer!
Tomorrow is our monthly La Leche League meeting... maybe some of the girls will have helpful tips or homeopathic advice. These bottom teeth are swollen buds which are refusing to break. I really wish that they would.. I'm not sure how many nights I can endure before pulling my own hair out sounds like a reasonable answer!
Picture Review
The last week has not proved any slower than previously thought! After unpacking from our last trips I got back into the peddal of things in my spinning class, we spent the entire weekend and yesterday at the beach, I cooked a few good meals, Sasha and boys were here for a few days, and whew... today Benny and I got ALLLLLLLL the laundry done! This actually meant lugging the laundry basket up and down the stairs with Benny in it! I'm exhausted. I feel like I have been non stop!
Anyway, we have discovered that Benny loves cherries this week and now officially walks (unsteadliy of course) from roomto room trying to find mommy if I happen to get out of his sight for a quick minute! He also has a new fondness for the sand at the beach and would love to lay in it if we would let him!
Here is a quick review of the week in pictures! Enjoy!
The newest additions to our family: Benny's two front teeth!
Hence why he is chewing on EVERYTHING!
Laundry day: Don't throw the baby out with the wash water!
BEACH WEEKEND!!!
A bucket of salt water sounds like a good meal!
Johnny had to forfiet his t-shirt after Benny had to be stripped down to his diaper at the beach!
He's just so dang cute!
It gets cold after DAD lets the BABY get soaked in the water!
It was a long tiresome day at the beach!PARK DAY!!!!!
We can't get him to keep his little hiney seated!
Cherries.. Yummy!
A sleeping baby is a GREAT baby!
A closer look at this picture shows green eyes for the day!
We moved the lamp to the other side of the room and tried to hide it with the chair..you can see from this picture how well it worked!
